


Oblivious, Not so Oblivious Love

by Bird4714



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Buddie (Relationship), First slash story, I'm Bad At Tagging, M/M, My First Work in This Fandom, Pre-Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:29:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23391745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bird4714/pseuds/Bird4714
Summary: "You want to know what's hard? Loving your best friend and being able to hide it so well that no one notices, not even yourself sometimes." "You know what sucks? Being in love with your best friend and doing absolutely nothing to really hide it and he is the only one who doesn't know."
Relationships: Eddie Diaz & Howie "Chimney" Han (9-1-1 TV), Eddie Diaz & Maddie Buckley (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Christopher Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Evan "Buck" Buckley & Maddie Buckley, Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Kudos: 154





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is cross-posted on FF.net as well under Dracolover14

You want to know what’s hard? Loving your best friend and being able to hide it so well that no one notices, not even yourself sometimes. It started off as small stuff, you know, like all things do. It wasn’t the small touches that lingered or the glances that stayed too long. No, it was the game nights with Christopher and Eddie on the good and bad days. The times Eddie made sure that I even got out of bed during the days where I was essentially healed, but still couldn’t go to work. It was the moments where Eddie left Chris with me after the tsunami that I could tell that my best friend still trusted me with his son even though I still woke up with nightmares and have Eddie’s number dialed to call before I realize that it’s two in the morning. 

Having Eddie and Chris be there for me constantly, even when I didn’t want company. When I just wanted to wallow in pity and fear and doubt that things would never be the same for me. It was like they became my hope. Sure, I had everyone else, but even big strong Evan Buckley needs a hero at some points too. Edmundo and Christopher Diaz became that for me.

At first, I tried to ignore it. I mean come on, the man just recently lost his wife and being his best friend, I know he’s as straight as a freaking arrow. It doesn’t stop the small feelings I get that he feels something too. I ignore it and then overthink it once I am home so I can cause my self to panic. Even if he did like men as well, why would he want ex-playboy extraordinaire when he could have anyone else?   
When I first suspected I was in love with my best friend I immediately laughed it off. Even if I did, I didn’t want it to ruin anything. I didn’t want to lose the closest thing I had besides Maddie. I really didn’t want to lose Christopher if anything happened either. I loved that kid with everything I have, and I would do anything for him. The sly thing knows more than he lets on, but I’m not sure what he knows. 

~~~~~

You know what sucks? Being in love with your best friend and doing absolutely nothing to really hide it and he is the only one who doesn’t know. I don’t go out of my way with big gestures, it’s the little things that matter in these instances. Especially around Chris and the team. It’s the panic I know that shows on my face when Buck runs into buildings without me. The fear that I won’t be able to help him if he needs it. The lingering gazes during meals with the team. The closeness in the truck before and after tough calls. Trusting him with my son was also a big thing.

The knowing glances I get from Bobby and Hen and the smirks from Chim and even Maddie, the female Buckley. Even Athena gives these looks and the others on the 118, except my Buckley. The poor man is so oblivious to what is in front of him.

“So, Eddie, when are you going to put him out of his misery and tell him?” Chimney walked up beside me as we peered out the doorway watching Buck play with Chris, Harry, and Denny. Everyone had gotten together at Athena’s and Bobby’s as a surprise for Buck for being cleared fully, again, to come back for work. 

“Tell who what?” I said as I took a drink of the beer in my hand. While I didn’t hide it and I knew everyone knew, doesn’t mean that I want it out in the open right now.   
Chim side-eyed me and scoffed, “You know exactly what I mean Eddie. I swear I don’t know if you have actually checked on Chris the amount of times you have said or if it’s an excuse just to stare at Buck.”

“Of course, I’m checking on Chris. If Buck just happens to be beside him then I’m not going to just not look.” I said and I realized that I semi admitted it out loud to one of the worst gossips on the team. I stopped my face from showing my slight panic. Apparently, I didn’t do too good of a job, because I can hear Maddie and Hen approaching with light chuckles. 

“You don’t have to worry Eddie. You would have to be blind to not see that my brother loves you and Chris. He just believes that you are straight and has no chance, you know?” Maddie said as she took a drink of her wine and we watched as her eyes got wide. “Oh no, don’t tell him I said anything. Howie, you were supposed to make sure I didn’t drink too much. I’m turning into a gossip like Evan.”

“For one, I did try to stop you. Se-“ Chim started to say, but Hen interrupted. 

“Eddie, you’ll regret it if you don’t tell him. Look at him with Chris. He treats Chris as if he were his own. And before you say it, yes, he treats Harry, May, and Denny exceptionally well, he isn’t as protective over them as he is with Chris. You two have pretty much been parenting that boy together without even realizing it. We aren’t pressuring you. We just want you two to be happy and being around each other is what makes you happy.” Hen said as she smiled at me and I couldn’t stop the slight blush and the gigantic smile on my face even if I wanted to. All of us jumped a bit when we heard Buck right beside us.

“What’s got so happy Eds?” If I didn’t know Evan as well as I did, I wouldn’t have been able to pick up on the slight hint of jealousy. I would neither confirm nor deny on what that made me feel. I looked up at him and smiled even more just from having him near me. God the things this man does to me just by being around. 

“I’ll tell you later, deal?” I asked and raised my eyebrow in question. I watched as he took a slight, sharp inhale and I felt my smile turn more into a smirk.

“Deal.” He cleared his throat and looked towards the floor. 

“Daddy!” I heard and turned to the back patio and out of the corner of my eye notice Buck do the same. I watched as Christopher made his way to us and I crouched down to swoop him up. “I’m tired dad. Can we and Bucky go home?” 

“Well,” I started and looked around. Not wanting to just ditch but wanting to take care of Christopher at the same time. They all nodded and hid smirks behind their hands about the Buck coming home as well. I rolled my eyes and turned back to Chris. “Yeah buddy. We can go home. But you’ll have to ask Buck if he wants to come over.” We both turned to look at him. Mine pleading for him to say yes so, I can spend more time with him, so I can selfishly have him for myself for a bit. Christopher, I know wants an accomplice to try and get many bedtime stories and cuddles before he finally crashed on the couch with Buck and I more than likely. 

“Of course, I’ll come over Chris. You would have to drag me away.” Buck said as he laid a hand on the middle of Christopher’s back. 

“Yay!” Chris said as he reached for Buck and Buck gladly took him and adjusted him, so he was comfortable.

We said our goodbyes everyone hugging Buck telling him congratulations and giving me the looks behind his back and we finally headed out the door and home.


	2. Not So Oblivious Anymore

The whole way home Christopher was telling me about his day and everything little thing he did. He kept asking questions about Buck and if he could spend the night all the time and I smiled.

“Buddy, we don’t even really know if Buck wants to stay all of the time. We can’t force him to.” I said as we pulled in. 

“But, you like Buck and Buck likes you dad. Why can’t he stay all the time?” Christopher said as I helped him out of the truck. I looked down at my beautiful child and wished I could have the confidence that he had. He full on believed that Buck liked me that way. I obviously loved this man, but Chris was so sure. 

“While Buck may like me Chris, he could just like me like a friend okay? I’m sure Buck will want to stay with you as much as possible.” I ruffled his hair as Buck’s Jeep pulled in beside us.

“Who wouldn’t want to stay with me?” Chris giggled and I couldn’t stop the laugh.

“What’s got you two laughing?” Buck approached and I couldn’t help but notice how close he stood. 

“My son here has spent a lot of time with you that he is picking up your ego.” I smirked and made my way to the door knowing that Buck would help Chris. 

“What ego? I am a purely confident male. There isn’t a single bit of an ego in this body.” He snarked back and I could hear the teasing.

Flipping on the lights as I made my way through, I told Christopher to go ahead and get ready for bed and we could watch a movie if he wanted. The smile that lit up his face made it worth the knowing that he was going to be impossible to wake in the morning. 

I quickly got the couch set up and TV ready for when he was ready, and I could feel Buck’s eyes on me until Chris called for him to help him brush his teeth. The quick inhale was just to keep me focused. It wasn’t a result of the feeling of Buck’s hand brushing against my back as he walked past. Yeah, keep telling yourself that. I shook my head and went to change out of work clothes and to check on my boys. 

I leaned against the doorway and watched. I would never admit it to Chimney, but I did like to watch Buck. The smile on his face when he interacted with kids, but especially Chris made my heart melt and swell at the same time. The protectiveness he gets when doing his job or when he thinks someone needs it. The way he positions his body to show that he is actively listening to someone and then when he positions his body when he is annoyed and wants you to know it or when he is trying to hide it. There is so much about Buck that I love to watch, and I could never get enough of it.

As if he knew I was there, he turned and did this half smile of his that gets me every time. 

“I can take him, if you want to change.” I said as I walked into the room. Chris gave me a smile and just by looking at him I know he’ll be asleep soon. I don’t know if I’m excited for that or scared to be alone with Buck. Which is ridiculous. 

“You hear that bud; your dad is trying to keep you all to himself.” Buck said in a horrible whisper and Chris quickly wrapped his arms around Buck’s neck. The night was full of laughter and this moment was one of them. 

“Alright, go to your dad and I’ll steal you back once I’m in comfy clothes alright?” Buck said as he gently untangled Chris and stood up to go to the guest room. The thought of him hopefully not having to stay in there flashed through my head before I shook it away.

“Come here buddy.” I bent down and picked Christopher up and he tucked his head into my neck, and we made our way to the living room and got cuddle up on the couch. “What movie you want to watch?” as I fiddled with the remote.

“Nemo.” I turned to look at him to make sure that is what he said. He hadn’t wanted to watch anything with water since the tsunami. 

“You sure Christopher?” I was worried this would cause nightmares, but I didn’t want to hinder his recovery. I also wasn’t going to mention that I was worried what this would do to Buck, who as far as I know, hasn’t watched anything to deal with water.

He nodded and I pulled it up on the screen. Once it loaded, Buck made his way into the room with waters. He plopped down on the couch and turned to us.

“So little man, what are we watching?” He asked as he opened the waters and passed them around.

“Finding Nemo!” Chris said with a smile and I watched as Buck’s smile turned strained. He hid it well from Chris though and nodded and we started the movie. Not even halfway through Chris was fast asleep against Buck with his legs draped across my lap. I paused the movie and adjusted Chris to pick him up. 

“I’ll put him to bed. You can put whatever you want on.” I whispered and he nodded. I walked to Chris’s room and tucked him under his blankets and took his glasses off. I watched him for a minute just to put myself at ease and walked back out after turning the light off and leaving the door cracked. 

~~~~~~~~

I couldn’t stay on the couch once Eddie walked out with Christopher. The movie, as childish as it is, brought back memories of Christopher not being by my side for hours and I didn’t want to face nightmares tonight. Not after such a good day. I made my way to the kitchen to get a beer. When I opened the fridge, I stared. I didn’t fully realize earlier, but Eddie’s fridge had a lot of things I preferred. My favorite beer, my favorite fruit. All intermingled with Eddie’s and Chris’s favorites and necessities. I grabbed myself and Eddie a beer and closed it before my thoughts could run rampant and to slow my heart down before it could jump out of my chest. 

I heard his padded feet on the floor, before I looked up and saw him approaching the beer sat next to me. We stood in silence for a bit but thank God it wasn’t an awkward silence. I was able to get my heart under control and relax from the movie. I focused on my breathing and tried to match it to Eddie’s calm breaths. 

“You okay?” Eddie asked as he scooted closer along the counter and sat his beer on the counter. 

“Yeah, I’m fine.” I mumbled and stopped myself from curling in on myself. He looked at me with that look that I swear he is reading me better than anyone. He is the only one who doesn’t push, who doesn’t look at me in pity. As much as everyone tries not to, they do. “It’s just the movie. Brought back memories is all.” He nodded and didn’t push it. 

“So, you still want to know what everyone was talking about or you just want to go to bed?” Eddie asked with a small smirk and I tried to hide the intake of breath, but I could tell he caught it and his smirked turned bigger.

“Of course, I want to know. You had three big gossips around you, and you were in a big huddle.” I said as I turned to face him. “Are you going to tell me?” Unless I was imagining it, Eddie was slowly coming closer and I was trying to ignore it. 

“Well, I don’t know how to start this.” Eddie stumbled and I couldn’t stop the smile at seeing someone who is normally so collected and knows what to say at a lost for words. 

“How about why they started flocking to you like baby ducks?” I said and felt proud of the smile and laugh I received. 

“Well, I was looking out and I was looking at Chris and Chimney came up to me. He asked when I was going to put you out of your misery.” He said as he stared into my eyes. I couldn’t help but stare into his amazing brown eyes. Then the word misery stood out.

“Out of my misery?” I tried not to think the worst, that he was going to kick me out of his and Christopher’s lives. I wouldn’t be able to live with that.

“Get those thoughts out of your head Buckley. I would never make you leave Chris.” He said it so sincerely and serious that I couldn’t not believe him. He grabbed my hand and held tight and I nodded, not taking my eyes from him. 

“Okay, Chim was picking at me,” I couldn’t stop the annoyance about that no matter how small it was, no one should pick at him. Eddie read my face clearly but continued “about staring at some one and not actually checking on Chris every time I peaked out the door. I kind of admitted something and tried to hide it, but your lovely sister and Hen heard it. Maddie, is turning into a bit of a gossip.” He said with a laugh and I couldn’t help but nod. Her hanging around more people, especially Josh, and not afraid that things would have a consequence she has become more outspoken. 

“She made the joke that she was turning into a gossip like you.” He said. “I could hear the happiness in herself though.”

“I’m glad she is getting out of her shell. She deserves it.” I said and Eddie nodded.

“She said something that I really want to be true but am scared to fully believe.” My brow furrowed and I opened my mouth to ask, but the look in his eyes told me to wait. That the answer would come. “Hen said some stuff and it finally made me realize what was in front of me.” He ended in a whisper and the way he was looking at me was making it very hard to control the rapid beating of my heart and blush on my face. There was no way this was real. He couldn’t be telling me what I have dreamed about. 

“What exactly did Hen say?” not being able to speak more than a whisper. I didn’t want to ruin this, this hope.

“She said I would regret it if I didn’t tell you how I feel. Her and Maddie made me realize that what I was feeling wasn’t one sided.” He said and I watched his eyes flickered down to my mouth and I really wanted to pinch myself. This couldn’t be real.

“Are you serious? Please tell me this isn’t a joke.” I said and felt his hand on my shoulder.

“I am being completely honest. I would never joke about this. I love you Evan Buckley. I don’t know when it turned more, but I love you. I love how you are with Christopher. How protective of him you are. It means so much to me that you love him as much as I do.” He said and I felt a tear go down my cheek. He moved his hand to wipe it off and he kept his hand there. 

Slowly his head moved closer, eyes flickering down to my lips and my tongue moved to wet them in nerves. Softly, his lips landed on mine and it was more than anything I could have expected. His lips were soft and gentle. He didn’t push for more, he kept it slow. When the shock that this man was actually kissing me wore off and before he could move away, I kissed back. It wasn’t a long kiss, but it was perfect and world changing all the same.

“I love you too Edmundo Diaz.” I said and the smile on his face proved that this is what we both wanted. I couldn’t stop the smile that spread on my face after that. Or the tears that wanted to join in the happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! My first 911 and Buddie story completed! Let me know what you all think!

**Author's Note:**

> There will be a part two! This is the first time writing 911 or even producing something like this for a slash story. Let me know what you all think!


End file.
